Well apparently he's into motor boating.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
