Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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