And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
