just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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