Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
