the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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