i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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