If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
