She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
PANTIES FOUND
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
