So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Pooping to opera.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize