Whod you bang
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
