So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize