hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
