id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
