the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My vagina is officially offended.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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