why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize