you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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