Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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