You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
