butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
