I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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