He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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