I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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