How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
