YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
