Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
