Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
