im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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