How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize