I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
