i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
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