Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Bring me that man meat
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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