Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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