He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Randomize
