Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
My balls are so social today.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
