Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
