he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
