im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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