just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize