I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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