i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
