I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
