i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
