please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
