Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
