Me too!
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
