dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize