PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
