so that wasnt chicken after all
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
