JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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